16 beers

confessions of a squash court manager

episode 11

16 Beers 

"Hey squashgodfather you've got a pretty fit and athletic figure?"
nice bloke, I always thought  Vito was a top fella.
"for a guy your age."
arsehole!  
"How do you do it?"

This was an interesting question coming from Vito, who has been a regular once a week squash player for many years. However over the last couple of years I have noticed his guts appears to be getting bigger each week. Not a very good advertisement for the corleone squash center CSC!
 "Its not easy Vito, I maintain a very vigorous exercise regime, one which a normal human would find hard to even attempt."

"What about your diet" He asked desperately looking for an option rather than doing any extra exercise.

"Well I have a pretty normal diet, but I do enjoy a couple of beers mid week with my nightly dinner, and on the weekend I cut loose and have 3 or 4 and some wine." I could see his jaw drop, obviously hoping that I maintained this Adonis like physique on a strict diet of lettuce leaves and water.

"You call that cutting loose?" He said with a look of sheer amusement. 

"Why,  how much do you drink?" I asked him.

"During the week Monday through Thursday I have at least 16 stubbies, and more on the weekends."
Holy shit !  I am amazed he even has a  pulse, and I bet that's not sweat on his forehead but pure fucking beer.

"You must be bloody joking? 16 stubbies at least every night, that's your problem Vito"
I now realize its probably not his stomach that has grown, but his fucking bladder.
"Try cutting back to an even dozen a night, the weight will fall off you." NOT

Pearls of wisdom!

good squashing

squashgodfather